dreams & denial

September 12, 2016 at 9:30 pm | Posted in after death?, Death, Grief, Jake, life after loss, Love | 8 Comments
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quote-dream

August, as I have written about in the past, is filled with happy as well as hard days.  This year August started out with our dog, Buddy, dying.  I wrote about how I was in denial about his death and wondered how long I could stay there.

On and off throughout the month I was haunted by a dream where I could not find Jake.  I would try to go back to sleep in hopes that I could go back to the dream and find him.  One weekend I slept as much as possible determined to search for and find Jake in my dreams.  It did not work.  If I had the dream about Jake I always awoke without finding him.

Last night I finally found Jake in my dreams – he was with Buddy.  So, to answer my own question about “how long can I stay in denial?” it seems like the answer is about a month.  I sure do miss them both.

“When you come to the edge of all the light you know and are about to step off into the darkness of the unknown, faith is knowing that one of two things will happen: there will be something solid to stand on or you will be taught to fly.”   – author unknown

 

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land of denial

August 8, 2016 at 9:14 pm | Posted in Grief | 8 Comments
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I am in denial.  Buddy (our older smaller dog) died last week.  I know it is true because I was there and because Evan posted it on Facebook but somehow it still seems unreal.

I should be some sort of grief expert by now.  I am not.  As the twins said, “It is okay mama, Buddy is now playing with Jake, Sawyer, Mom Mom and Grandpoppy.”

Wonder how long I can stay in denial. . .

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