11 Months

October 18, 2010 at 3:10 pm | Posted in mourning, silver lining, traditions | 10 Comments

Yesterday we should have been taking 11 month pictures of Sawyer.   A very close and clever friend told me about taking pictures of her son with a sign of his age.   She said it makes it easier to go back and put the pictures in a scrapbook.   Well, I have yet to make any scrapbooks but I did borrow her idea and take the pictures.  

Every month I would print a sign.  We would put the twins in pottery barn chairs from their great grandparents.  One of us would sing head, shoulders, knees and toes and the other one would snap as many pictures as possible.   Hopefully, we would get both twins looking at the camera and/or smiles.   For example: 

Smiles, sort of looking at the camera

Both looking at the camera, no smiles








The day after taking the pictures I would email them to family and friends. Jake only lived 2 weeks so we were not able to take any month pictures. On December 17th, 2009 we did take 1 month pictures of Sawyer. We improvised and used one of the twins’ chairs with a Sawyer towel over the name. Sawyer’s pottery barn chair arrived in the mail the week after he passed away. Here is one of those pictures.

Sawyer - 1 month

Today, the day I should be sending out Sawyer’s 11 month pictures, I  am instead emailing this blog.  And, the twins’ 11 month picture:

1 smiling & looking at camera; both - haircuts


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  1. As always, I’m thinking of you and your beautiful brood.

  2. Thanks for sharing the 1 month picture of Sawyer. It is a lovely memory of a beautiful child, and it shows a strength in you that’s growing each day.

  3. The pictures are precious. It breaks my heart that you aren’t sending me new photos of Sawyer. Sending you lots of love.

  4. Thinking of you.

  5. Saying a prayer for you right now. I admire you more than you know for sharing your heart with us.

  6. I am struck by two things – what a beautiful baby Sawyer was and how lucky I was to get to see these twins growing up for the last two years. We miss you and your family. We think of you daily and we keep searching for rocks! All our love…

  7. As always, I love your perspective.

    Tommorrow will be 6 years since the I become a bereaved mother for the first time. As you know all too well, the fact that I have to distinguish that from the 2nd (and 3rd) times is either ridiculous, cruel, or both.

  8. My heart breaks for you and Evan. The twins are beautiful and of course so was Sawyer.
    There are no words to take away your pain, I do feel your pain and know in time the pain will not be as sharp and cruel.
    God Bless you with faith and hope for a softer tomorrow.

  9. Lanie- thank ypu for sharing your brave and beautiful blog. Today, as many others, is a painful milestone. I don’t know how you do it. Your courage is beyond comprehension. love and strength to you today. Xo

  10. Thank you for this, Lanie. All of your children are beautiful, and lucky to have you as their mom.
    Much love,

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