Second Star
February 18, 2014 at 11:14 pm | Posted in Grief, Jake, life lessons, Love, Sawyer, Time | 5 CommentsTags: baby loss, child loss, death of a baby, international star registry, new not so normal, siblings, stars, ways to honor the memory of your child
When Jake died the hospital gave us a packet of information to take home. I remember trying to read it through my tears and being unable to make out most of the words. When I got to the page on “Ways to Honor Your Child” I got a tissue, wiped my eyes and read. One of the ways was to name a star. Before I knew it I was on the phone buying a star for Jake:
Jake’s Star
The star date is his birthday and it is in the constellation of Leo (Jake’s zodiac sign). We have the star certificate with all of Jake’s other belongings. I think before now the only other person I told that I bought a star was Evan. Buying the star made me feel a bit better for the moment. It was something I could do for Jake. Funny how time changes some things. . .
After Sawyer died I did not buy a star. The thought of buying another star did not make me feel better. Recently, I came across Jake’s star certificate and decided that I did want a star for Sawyer after all.
I tried to order it online and then finally called. I wanted Sawyer’s star date to be his birthday, just like Jake’s. The star registry only goes back 2 years – which meant 2012, 2013 or this year. There is no 2009 option. I chose this year – for Sawyer’s 5th birthday.
Sibling rivalry is an issue at times in our house with the twins. I will never know if Sawyer would be unhappy that Jake had a star and he did not but the second star bought to avoid any worries. It made me feel a bit better and it was something I could do for Sawyer.
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A Mourning Mom 
Just tonight as I was walking over to Polly’s I was gazing up, marveling at all the beautiful stars. They were so bright and there were so many. Now I read your post and wonder if I happened to see Jake or Sawyer’s star tonight. I’d like to think that I did. Next time I look up and look for Orion, or the Big Dipper, I’ll be thinking of Jake and Sawyer too.
Comment by Amy Johnson— February 18, 2014 #
A friend bought a star in our son’s name on the 2nd anniversary of his angel date. It was the most heartfelt gift for my husband and I. Christopher’s Dragon Star.
Comment by Caroline— February 19, 2014 #
What a beautiful thought – gazing up at your stars!
Comment by Daphne— February 19, 2014 #
It’s a lovely gesture–and I’m sure he’d understand–regardless! And gives us all something additionally special to see in the sky….
Comment by eden— February 24, 2014 #
[…] a star after your […]
Pingback by How to Remember Your Child | A Mourning Mom— February 28, 2014 #