Help
May 2, 2012 at 10:18 pm | Posted in after death?, Grief, life after loss, life lessons, normal?, twins | 23 CommentsTags: child loss, death of a baby, hope, Jake, new not so normal, quotes, Sawyer, siblings
Aibileen, from The Help, whispers this quote in Mae Mobley’s ear every day so she will understand that she is special. Are there words which I can whisper into my toddlers’ ears that will help them understand about their brothers?
The other day I was driving the twins and listening to their conversation. They were discussing one of their friend’s new baby sister. The conversation went something like this:
“We have babies too.”
“Our babies are not growing.”
“They are flowers.”
“Flowers grow. So, our babies are growing.”
“Mama, what kind of flowers are Jake and Sawyer?”
A long silence from me. I finally come up with, “want to go to the new playground?”
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A Mourning Mom 
Oh my dear, I don’t know how I would have answered this either.
They are growing flowers, but not here with you…in heaven maybe?
Such beautiful kids you have 🙂
Comment by kidsakeeper— May 2, 2012 #
Heaven sounds good to me. Thank you so much.
Comment by amourningmom— May 8, 2012 #
They are beautiful, gorgeous flowers that are in our hearts. Always.
Comment by Kelcey— May 2, 2012 #
Thank you so much. Always. xoxo
Comment by amourningmom— May 8, 2012 #
you touched me. i had a flower also. thank you for sharing the hurt in your soul.
Comment by sarahjanelives— May 2, 2012 #
I like to think that all the flowers are somewhere having a cosmic playdate. Thank you.
Comment by amourningmom— May 8, 2012 #
I think it is a priceless moment. If we could all just think about things so simply as children do 😉
Comment by jenrad-HelpingHimGrieve— May 2, 2012 #
I agree – the world would be a very different place if we could all think aobut things simply.
Comment by amourningmom— May 8, 2012 #
They are Forget Me Nots. They are sunflowers, they are moonflowers, They are every flower, everywhere love grows. And they are watered with our tears.
Blessings,
Linda
Comment by The Good Cook— May 2, 2012 #
I love all of those flowers – thank you for your thoughtful comment. xoxo
Comment by amourningmom— May 8, 2012 #
Dahlin’, I love the honesty that comes from Fletcher and Alyssa and I love that they talk about Jake and Sawyer. No answers, but lots and lots and lots of love.
Comment by Amy Johnson— May 3, 2012 #
Thank you for all the love – sending it right back to you. xoxo
Comment by amourningmom— May 8, 2012 #
I like that…flowers. I think of Jason when I see certain flowers sometimes…varying colors of roses…because that was his flower of choice to give to people he cared for…daffodils…because they are so bright and sunshiney…just like he was…tulips remind me of going many times as a family to visit the rainbow-colored tulip fields in northern Washington…daisies…because he loved “You’ve Got Mail” and thought daisies were such a happy flower…and gave daisies to cheer up a sad friend…
Comment by Rebecca Carney - One Woman's Perspective— May 3, 2012 #
Jason definitely sounds like he is many flowers. My thoughts are with you and him. Take care. xoxo
Comment by amourningmom— May 8, 2012 #
It speaks very highly of you as a mom that your twins know that they can ask you any question about their brothers. You’ve clearly been open with them, even though it’s so very painful for you. You are a whole family of flowers.
Comment by dilovely— May 3, 2012 #
Thank you – I have never thought of us all as being flowers – I like that image. We are all flowers but in different gardens for the moment.
Comment by amourningmom— May 8, 2012 #
They have the most beautiful way of talking about and remembering their brothers. They are flowers,and lights, and love and hugs and everything else.
Comment by Daphne— May 3, 2012 #
Thank you – I am hoping that they will always talk about and remember their brothers. xoxo
Comment by amourningmom— May 8, 2012 #
amourningmom, thank you for leaving a comment on my joshua-mom blog. And especially that you will pray for me. Even though it has been eight years since my baby boy, although he was 25, died. I like your blog, Mother of two boys that have gone on to Paradise!
Comment by Jean Ann Williams— May 3, 2012 #
Thank you – my thoughts are with you and Joshua. Take care.
Comment by amourningmom— May 8, 2012 #
It doesn’t matter what kind of flowers they are. The point is, they’ve taken root in all of us.
Comment by Eden— May 4, 2012 #
I agree with you 100% – it does not matter what kind of flowers they are. . . xoxo
Comment by amourningmom— May 8, 2012 #
I could not agree more. xoxo
Comment by amourningmom— May 8, 2012 #