Scent of Sawyer

July 14, 2013 at 1:02 pm | Posted in Grief, life lessons, Sawyer, venting | 9 Comments
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One of the lessons that Jake and Sawyer have taught me is not to sweat the small stuff.  In the grand scheme of things there is so much stuff that just does not matter in the end.

This post, however, is about small stuff.   Method has discontinued their line of babies and kids products.  I know that there is most likely a business reason why the line did not make it.  However, I just wish they could bring the product line back.  We have used their products (body wash, shampoo, lotion, laundry detergent and dryer sheets).  We used a particular scent — rice milk and mallow — with Sawyer.  We all loved the smell, and appreciated that they were natural products with nothing to harm Sawyer’s (or any of our) skin.

The smell of the products reminds me of Sawyer.  So, after he died, we continued to use the products.  The frequent and sweet reminder of him in the smell of our clothes or at the twins’ bath time is, in a way, comforting.  Now the product line has been discontinued, and it is hard to find the products anywhere.  I am sure that at some point, we won’t be able to find them at all anymore.

One more small bit of Sawyer that will no longer be in our lives.  Yes, it is a small thing.  But it is one more small thing I wish I could change.

Sawyer and Nanny

And, a giant thank you to Evan for finding me some of the last of the bottles on eBay!


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  1. I completely relate to this. I have a homemade lavender balm that I used post-partum with Sebastian, and although it has sad associations, it also makes me feel close to him. I think I will probably never use the last of it, so that I still have access to that.

  2. I’ve heard that smell is the greatest memory trigger. I have found that definitely to be the case in my life. I know this is a small thing, but I hear how it is also very sad for you. You should write the company…maybe they have an extra case or two they could sell you. You never know! P.S. Good job Evan.

  3. small stuff can have big impact. x

  4. Smell is such a powerful thing — it can bring back a moment in a flash.

  5. Completely understand this. Sentiment (whether sweet or sad) triggered by that special smell. You should definitely write a letter to, or call the company…they may be able to help you locate more….

  6. I so understand this as well. I broke down in tears not too long ago because the late night television show lineup changed. For the past 3 years I could count on the same shows coming on at the same time. My son and I had watched them together before he died. Now that the lineup is changing it’s like losing a little piece of him. Sounds silly to some but it’s sad to me.

    Rebecca Patrick-Howard

  7. Your concern might seem small to some, but it represents a very intimate and significant connection that a parent has with a baby. A baby’s smell is one of the special delights that parents enjoy, so this is yet another loss for you.

  8. I’m so sorry for your loss. I understand about the sweet smell of rice milk and mallow. Just to let you know, Target has Method shower gel and hand soap in the rice milk and mallow scent. It’s in the 2014 fall collection for a limited time… stock up just to have those memories the scent can bring you. The bottle is lime green and blue with white writing and its very hard to read, but once you open it and take a sniff you will know. Hope this is helpful for you.

  9. […] GOOD news – –  As part of their Fall collection, Method brought back Rice Milk & Mallow (the scent that reminds us of Sawyer).  And instead of just letting us find it in the store, they […]

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