Sawyer and the strawberry

December 28, 2017 at 4:58 pm | Posted in Grief, life after loss, Love, Sawyer | 6 Comments
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December 26th is the date on Sawyer’s death certificate. I am not sure when exactly he died but Evan and I kissed him good night for the last time on December 25th.

No one ever really knows how long we have between birth and death. I am very thankful for the time we did have with Sawyer.

Buddhist story:
“A man traveling across a field encountered a tiger. He fled, the tiger after him. Coming to a precipice, he caught hold of the root of a wild vine and swung himself down over the edge. The tiger sniffed at him from above. Trembling, the man looked down to where, far below, another tiger was waiting to eat him. Only the vine sustained him.

Two mice, one white and one black, little by little started to gnaw away the vine. The man saw a luscious strawberry near him. Grasping the vine with one hand, he plucked the strawberry with the other. How sweet it tasted!”

There are many interpretations of this story.  I like to think of the strawberry as the present.  One of the tigers is birth and the other death.

I wish I had more time to spend with Sawyer.  If I had known that time (and the tiger of death) were present and against us that Christmas night when we kissed him goodnight, I am sure that I would have never stopped kissing him.  Love and miss you sweet Sawyer.



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  1. Beautiful post, Lanie. Thanks for sharing this story and the Buddist tale.

  2. thank you lanie for sharing.

  3. Dear Lanie and Family –
    You are wise, with that Buddhist story and your interpretation. I believe, it is better that we don’t know how long we have between birth and death but we can surely all agree that Sawyer had too little time. As did Jake.
    I’m thinking of you all and wishing a fine New Year to you.
    Love, Cornelia

  4. I am thinking about you my friend. It is so hard to be fully present sometimes, and also it’s so difficult to feel grateful when there is so much that is missed. You are such a strong woman Lanie.

  5. Beautiful thoughts Lanie, thanks for sharing it with all of us. Thinking of you all this time of year – sending love, Daphne

  6. Your post is beautiful. You are wise. Thinking about you during this time of year.

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