The End of the School Year & Everything in BetweenMay 20, 2014 at 10:00 pm | Posted in Grief, Jake, life lessons, normal?, Sawyer, twins | 4 Comments
Tags: death of a baby, end of school year, first grade, gratitude, grief, life, loss of a child, new normal, parenthood, twins
This Friday is the last day of school for the twins! It does not seem that long ago that they started 1st grade. I try to enjoy the moments with the twins. Moments I know that I will never have with Jake or Sawyer. The Mother’s Day teas, the musical performances, the recitals, field days and the end of school year parties. However, I find myself in a panic this time of year. There is so much happening – all at the exact same time.
“Did I forget to dress them in the right color for their musical?”
“Did we remember to bring in the teacher appreciation card?”
“Did we make the teacher appreciation card?”
“How did we forget her glasses again this morning?”
I feel guilty about not enjoying ever single moment (all the ones that I will miss with Jake and Sawyer). I want the twins to be healthy, happy and grow up.
This week I looked around at some of the other parents – I saw the dazed looks on their faces. They are all in this end of the school year craziness too. I am not sure they are enjoying all of this end of the school year madness either. I want to appreciate all the moments I have with the twins. I think I will have to expand my definition of appreciation to include the happy, the sad, the chaotic and everything in between.